Thursday, 14 March 2013

When Exactly Did I Become "That Girl"?

I'm planning my High School reunion. Ten years. Oh Boy. I could say a slough of cliche things about how I can't believe this much time has passed and all that, but that's not why we're here today.

We're here to try to pinpoint the moment in time that I became the girl that plans her 10 Year Reunion. See, I mentioned to a co-worker and friend of mine that I was planning it, and his response was "Ya, I guess that makes sense. You're totally THAT girl. THAT girl planned my reunion too"

Here's the thing. In high school I definitely was not that girl. I wasn't on school council, or in Leadership (I think it was a class...? Or an extra curricular..?) I didn't help organize any pep rallies, or dances. Heck, I didn't even attend pep rallies or dances (Truth - I didn't go to ONE high school dance) Even when there were things going on during lunch hour in the cafeteria, I was usually found upstairs not watching, or not even in the school.

I was invisible. I was High School Boyfriend's (known from this point on as HSB) girlfriend. That was it. My identity. My life for 3 years. I'm not trying to say I was oppressed or anything, I just didn't know anything outside of my relationship with him. HSB was one year older than me, and we hung out mostly with his friends, so that prevented me from saying yes to a lot of my friend's requests. I had an active social life, it just all happened outside of school events and school activities. Looking back I would say I missed out on a lot, but that's neither here nor there.

So when did I become the confident leader am today? I think it's a two fold answer.

First- when I broke up with Boyfriend #3. I know I've talked about this before, but I had three long term relationships (with very little time in between) that spanned over 7 years It was a pretty big turning point when I was single for the first time at 22. A LOT of character development happened in that first year. I had to decided for myself who I wanted to be. No longer was I hanging off of someone's arm- I walked straight ahead with my head held high. It was great, and freeing, and terrifying all at once. I came out the other end a strong, confident, but slightly hardened woman.

Second of all I became a Christian. Not just a go-to-church-once-in-a-while Christian, but a Bible reading, Jesus following Christian. This was the beginning of the softening of all that hard stubbornness. Then I became a youth leader, which has taught me sooo much about myself. And then.... marriage. Marriage has been the meat mallet of my life. Sounds hard (and painful!) and sometimes it is, but with each hit, I find my heart softened. Tenderized if you will. This is pretty important to leading, because otherwise you'll end up dictating.

And so now I'm one who leads. I'm "That Girl" I kinda like it.

Side note - anyone know how to plan a reunion? I'm kind of winging it here...

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  1. Well in 2016 it will be my 20 year! Gasp!!! Where has time gone? How is the planning going?

    I am visiting from Life Blessons. Glad to find your blog! :)

    Happy week!

    1. Planning is going alright... there are a lot more people to find that I first anticipated though. Perhaps I have bitten off more than I can chew!

      Thanks for stopping by!