Just A Little Self Care

When I begin to feel overwhelmed there are a few things that happen. First, I stop making dinner. Chris usually picks up the slack, but sometimes it just means we eat out more. Next I stop cleaning each day. This one is unfortunate because then the chores pile up and add to the overwhelmed feelings. I also tend to stop leaving the house and seeing people, which once again is unfortunate because I am an extrovert and actually feel energized when I am around friends.

Another thing I stop doing is writing. You may have noticed? Sorry guys. I think what I have realized is that I see writing as a little bit frivolous. There are usually more important things I should be doing and if I'm not doing them I probably shouldn't be writing either. It's kind of like when you're home sick from school and you know you probably shouldn't go out for ice cream with your friends before your parents come home. If I have time to write a blog then I should probably go clean the bathrooms, ya know?

I took a nice long shower tonight, and when I was clean but not ready for the hot water to end I sat down and turned it into a bath. As I sat there I thought of how my heart no longer yearns for silence or soothing music, but instead it's filled to the brim when I hear my sweet husband babbling along with our chatterbox baby. I sat there until the water grew cold and I soaked in the peace of the not-so-quiet moment.

Once dry, instead of quickly combing my hair, I took my time. I put on nice smelling lotion and I got out some nail polish for my toes. I have no idea when the last time was that I painted my toenails, but I did tonight because it felt even more indulgent that writing. And then I sat down with a glass of chocolate milk and wrote this as Chris played with and bathed Elliott.

It was nothing huge. No big revelations tonight about what I've been doing wrong and how all of a sudden now I get it- just a little bit of self care.

Oh, and I think I already know what I'm going to make for dinner tomorrow.




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~M